“One great movie can change you.”—Michael Moore, Award winning director

Since the Baby Boomer generation (born between 1946-1964) is the largest ever born in U.S. history, it makes sense for the movie industry to target us. We tend to have more disposable income, more time to go to movies, and we grew up going to movies. What I find interesting is how the movie industry is waking up and realizing that Boomers want to watch movies that relate to our lifestyles, values, and passions. Actresses have said for years that parts dry up for women as they age, but I appreciate how the industry is finally recognizing that we can learn about how to navigate some of life’s transitions and challenges from watching great movies.

Movies in the past usually depicted people beyond mid-life with humor such as in Grumpy Old Men and the sequel Grumpier Old Men. Listed below are some recent films (and there are many more) worth your time and money for the thought provoking life lessons each was willing to address. These movies also stimulate conversation about topics that are often hard to discuss—but should be discussed with the appropriate people in your life. When I see in a movie and notice one of the major components of sage-ing or positive aging (exploring images of aging, engaging in life review, repairing relationships, embracing one’s mortality, and leaving a legacy) my antennas go up!

  • I’ll See You in My Dreams (2015)
    A late-in-life love story about a widow who realizes she is lonely only after losing her dog.
  • A Walk in the Woods (2015)
    Two old friends hike the Appalachian Trail and rekindle their friendship and reflect on their lives and life as a journey.
  • Grandma (2015)
    Outspoken grandma bonds with her 18 year-old granddaughter during a family crisis.
  • Learning to Drive (2015)
    An intercultural relationship develops as a mid-life woman learns to drive from a taxi driver from India.
  • Still Alice (2015)
    A woman in mid-life discovers she has a diagnosis of Early-Onset Alzheimer’s Disease and has to rethink how to proceed for the rest of her life.
  • The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (2011)
    Several British retirees travel to India to live in a newly restored hotel to find a less expensive lifestyle as they begin their next phase of life.
  • Quartet (2012)
    The story of a retirement home for British musicians and the relationships that emerge in community.
  • Amour (2012)
    A love story of a long marriage and how the husband deals with his wife’s illness.
  • Hope Springs (2012)
    Bored empty nesters are missing the physical spark that used to exist and attempt to regain the spark.

One movie in particular caught my attention last year: The Intern (2015). Robert De Niro plays Ben Whittaker, a retired, widower in Brooklyn who’s bored with the life after his career. He applies for a position in a “Senior Intern Program” at an e-commerce organization called “About The Fit.” After getting the position, he reports to its founder, Jules, played by Anne Hathaway—a highly driven young professional (YP).

The movie is a great depiction of old versus young—the traditional organizational culture versus the start up culture. He dresses and acts as a professional who is used to policies, procedures, and chain of command. De Niro comes to work dressed as a professional and is considered rather strange by these YPs. Hathaway and the other YPs are relaxed in their dress and behaviors, but savvy with their technology skills. The bottom-line is they perceive De Niro to be out of touch, in the way, and to not have value. They see no reason in “respecting elders.”

But as the movie progresses, De Niro starts adding value based on his life experience. He teaches them how to analyze data, develop relationships of trust, and to communicate effectively. In the end, De Niro (as sage) is respected for being the mentor and friend needed so badly by Hathaway. She realizes what she can learn from him and how fortunate she is to have De Niro at the company and in her life. It is a movie worth watching.

And even television is changing with a series with Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin in Grace and Frankie.

Perhaps you saw Frances McDormand in Olive Kitteridge, a four-part HBO mini-series. McDormand cast herself as “Olive” so she could be an older actor playing an older person with late-in-life worries. She said “Olive” was her “answer to an industry and a society that is fixated on youth.” McDormand put it this way:

We are on red alert when it comes to how we are perceiving ourselves as a species. There’s no desire to be an adult. Adulthood is not a goal. It’s not seen as a gift. Something happened culturally: No one is supposed to age past 45—sartorially, cosmetically, attitudinally. Everybody dresses like a teenager. Everybody dies their hair. Everybody is concerned with a smooth face.

Except McDormand. She continued, “I have not mutilated myself in any way.”

McDormand sounded like a Sage when she concluded, “Looking old should be a boast about experiences accrued and insights acquired, a triumphant signal that you are someone who, beneath that white hair, has a card catalog of valuable information.”

When we focus on continuing to add to our “card catalog of valuable information,” the rest of life can be the best of life.

 

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